It's strange, how it gets easier.
I haven't really eaten any solid food in 4 days. Maybe 300ish calories of juice each day, loads of beer last night. I did grab a handful of crisps while drunk but that's about it. It's funny how after a certain amount of time in a state of deprivation your body just clicks. Accepts it and stops fighting it. I'm not hungry today. That's a lie. I'm hungry, but not desperately, achingly, screamingly hungry anymore. I can take it or leave it. I know I should eat. Something little. Fruit and vegetables, keep my insides functioning and my metabolism ticking. But I know I can't. Once I'm not on a roll anymore I will be binging and purging again for sure. And if I start eating now and resume fasting tomorrow, I will be back to desperately, achingly, screamingly hungry again.
Tough call.
But right now, this very second, I'm feeling deliriously self satisfied and infinitely thinner.
x
Oh goodness, I LOVE that feeling...the one you're talking about there, "deliriously self satisfied and infinitely thinner..." Very well said, my love, and god...I can't wait to feel it again.
ReplyDeleteI think reading this post was just what I needed this morning. I've been bingeing like a friggin' maniac over the past week or so, it's shameful. Today, I thought, would be an excellent day to start a liquid fast (isn't every day?) but then I remembered early V-Day dinner with the bf tonight... Hmm. I suppose there's nothing wrong with sticking with tea until then, huh?
You inspire me more than I can say...Thank you! :)
I can't wait for my body to click over into that mode again...subsisting on so little and loving it. A reward in and of itself.
Hope you're well today! Stay lovely, dear! <3